Vegas Nerve

Day 1

Las Vegas, Nevada

Arrived about 8:15 AM, waited 45 minutes for the bus and got to the hotel around 10:15. Bhob paid the $50 Early Check-in fee, we navigated the manic sensory assault of the lobby, dropped off our stuff 

and went out in search of tacos. Just a few blocks away from Downtown things got gloriously quiet.

Two guys were walking in our direction and as one of them turned to say something to us, we thought "Oh boy, here we go. Panhandlers." But the guy said "You two look great together! You can tell you're a couple!'

Got to the taco truck

My family will recognize the manufacturer of the refrigeration unit

We were really hungry and didn't think that tacos would suffice, so we got tortas, but when I was handed the bag, it was so heavy that I realized we totally could have split it. We sat beside the auto body shop to eat half, then took the rest back to the hotel

before hitting Vegas Vickie's for a couple of Black Manhattans and a Desert Nights to share (which the bartender comped!)

Made our way through around some blocked (for a half marathon) streets in the arts district to get to the 24-hour (and very fancy!) dispensary to buy some gummies.

Kept walking

With a hankering for some self-indulgent TouchTunes, we found a bar on the map that was on the way to our next destination and had a shot of half Jack Daniels honey and half plain Jack while we regaled the unsuspecting patrons with William Onyeabor, Ministry, Scorpions, Os Mutantes, Danielle Dax, Rainbow, David Bowie, Benny Goodman, Britney Spears, AC/DC and Wham.

Caught the bus to the destination of Bhob's dreams

"Because it's my birthday and I wants it!"

Since the Hello Kitty Cafe didn't sell actual "food"

we went to the food court and got an AMAZING Paul Rubens sandwich and fries (with an equally amazing Dirty Sauce) at Ike's Sandwiches and Love

Waited a ridiculously long time for a Deuce bus back to Downtown. The first one was full-ish and the driver wouldn't let anyone else on (even though many more people could have comfortably fit; we have become quite accustomed to being jammed like sardines in the CDMX and São Paulo metros and thought that the driver was being unreasonable).

Finally got Downtown and made our way to a bar that was on every list I'd found of "Most Creative Cocktails in Las Vegas". From photos, it looked like an intimate, unique, classy joint, but it turned out to be in an open-air entertainment complex that was part State Fair Leinie Lodge, part playground, with a super cheesy, rather annoying band doing popular songs in ska arrangements. We were tired, and weary of noise, but since we'd taken the time to get there, and there were free seats at the bar, we thought "Why not?"

And Boy Howdy, were we ever glad we did!!! 

World-class, perfectly balanced flavors, and prices not too much higher than some of our Twin Cities faves. The bartenders were friendly and pleasant, and kept refilling our water glasses (we'd suddenly remembered that we were in a DESERT).

We had the Blasé Blasé and the one on the top, Two Suns

We vowed to return when they opened the next day at Noon.

On the way back to the hotel, scoped out the venue for the concert we had traveled to that monstrosity of a city to attend. We didn't see the name on the outside anywhere at first, but the "upcoming events" sign confirmed it.

Got back to the hotel around 8:15, and having been awake for 20 hours, I brushed my teeth, put in my earplugs and went right to bed, while Bhob stayed up and watched TV for a bit.

 

Day 2 

Las Vegas, Nevada 

Woke up after 8 hours of (mostly) uninterrupted sleep. Ate the rest of my torta, crossing my fingers that it hadn't suffered too much from having been unrefrigerated for a few hours. Bhob was still asleep, so I ordered a cold brew with olive oil foam from the Starbucks in the lobby, and it was ready in the time it took me to get down there.

I wanted to let Bhob sleep as long as possible, so filled the time with photo editing and blog writing (which is why the previous day's account is so superfluously detailed 😜).

Eventually went back to Vegas Vickie's for espresso martinis. Same bartender (Domanick) as the previous day. We evangelized about The Sure Thing, and he promised to watch it that night. He also comped our (shared) Drink Wisconsinbly cocktail.

It's Trouble Pop-O-Matic for grown-ups!

Walked back to the art district

to a mezcal bar

Walked

to a place that the bartender had recommended for lunch that was fantastic!

Walked 

back to Oak and Ivy and were greeted by the previous day's bartender, who had been called in on his day off. They were busy and short-staffed, so we had to wait awhile, but all was made right with more of that delicious cucumber water and more fab cocktails.

On the way back to the hotel, scoped out the venue and saw the two Crypta guitarists signing autographs for a fan in the parking lot! We didn't want to bother them, so we just bathed in the glow of their majestic presence from across the street.

Got to our room to shower and rest for a bit until the doors opened at the club. It wasn't clear if doors were at 7 PM or the show started at 7 PM, so we hedged our bets and got there at 6.

Nothing was happening, so we went across the street to a Mexican restaurant for a pre-show drink.

At 6:45, went back to the club and waited for about 30 minutes before going in and getting our VIP wristbands. The VIP tickets were basically for old people who just want to sit down for most of the show (and worth every penny).

All of the bands were dynamite!!! Sorrowseed, Eloteros and Madzilla blew the roof off the place. 

Sorrowseed

Eloteros, with a lead vocalist that Bhob dubbed "The Samoan Glenn Danzig"

But nothing could have prepared us for the powerful onslaught of Crypta 🤘🤘🤘

It was probably the best show I've seen in my life! Seeing them in a small venue in their prime was such a thrill and a privilege. I was screaming and crying with joy though most of it.

Got to the hotel restaurant at 11:59 PM, just in time to order a club sandwich and fries to take up to the room.

Day 3

Departure

Got up after 3 hours of "sleep".

I said to Bhob "That was the best night of my life!!!"

He replied "It still is!"

Ordered cold brew and egg bites from Starbucks the minute they opened at 5 AM.

Checked out, got the bus to the airport and had a leisurely wait for our flight.

Had to pay for the extra bags that showed up under my eyes.

 

FAQs

Why Las Vegas?

Because that was the city on Crypta's tour schedule that seemed to have the best tourist infrastructure and good deals on airfare and hotels.

 

 

So you don't hate it any more?

Oh, I still hate it, but the music venue and some friendly people won me over a tiny bit.

 

How were your flights? 

Uneventful.

We flew Sun Country

How was the weather?

Perfect! 

Mostly overcast, lows in the upper 40s, highs in the upper 60s.

How much did it cost?

Way too much.

But we didn't gamble, and got a couple of free bus rides due to various circumstances 😁

What's so special about Crypta?

On April 7, 2023, I liked some metal (e.g Iron Maiden, Rammstein), but never understood how anyone could listen to (let alone enjoy) extreme metal. To me, it sounded like nothing but noise, with irritating vocals that landed somewhere between Cookie Monster and Sam Kinison.

On April 8, 2023, a friend posted a GoFundMe campaign for a Brazilian band that was in the middle of a US tour when their rented RV was destroyed by a tornado. There was a good chance that they were going to be on the hook for $60,000. I'd never heard of them, but I thought, "That sucks! I can throw $10 their way".

After I donated, I was curious enough about them to check them out on the youtubes.

 What I heard stopped me in my tracks and changed my life forever.

I had no idea that when a woman is doing the brutal vocals, it has a witchy/sorceress/Kali sound, like 3000 years of repressed fury being unleashed.

I also hadn't realized how much I love when women's vocals are powerful without being pretty.

I forwarded the fundraising link to Bhob, and he was equally blown away (by the band, not the tornado).

Crypta led us to Napalm records, which led us to Arkona, Ignea and Nervosa, which led us to Ersedu, Bloodhunter and beyond. Between these bands, interwebz research and the algorithm tossing us a few gems, it's been a thrilling year of discovery 🤘

 

Wait a minute...Las Vegas ... Did you two get married?

What, and ruin a perfectly good relationship?

 

Will you go back?

Dear god I hope not